The Magic of The Serenity Prayer

Viktor E Frankl once said “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.”

A few years back I was doing some courses to get certified as a licensed ‘Psychological Counsellor’ and in the process happened to learn the ‘Serenity Prayer’ through my esteemed mentor. I must say that the magic of the prayer has had a profound impact on my perspective on life. The prayer is elegant in its simplicity and wisdom and the only religion it propagates is the religion of ‘humanity’.  It goes something like this :

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.”

The prayer although written in 1932 by American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr was only popularized in the 1950s.   

It is a prayer to god (could be any god or any super natural power you believe in) seeking the 'serenity to accept’ the things you cannot change in your life and work (for instance, natural disasters, COVID, loss or near and dear ones etc.) which we simply have no control upon. We must learn to accept such situations which we are in and should look at such difficult situations as opportunities for a new beginning, keep believing in ourselves and have faith that we are still capable to doing great things. Such an attitude will help us to think more rationally, feel more motivated, and we will be able to move on and be truly happy again. We should understand that fighting such realities will only drain us physically and emotionally without changing the reality.

It seeks the super natural to give you the courage to change the things you can (for instance, our emotions, our judgements, our creativity, our attitude, our perspective, our desires, our decisions, our determination etc.) which we ca control with self-awareness and practice. Controlling your emotions, your judgements, your perspective, your desires, your decisions etc. require a high level of courage but goes a long way in improving our interpersonal relationships, emotional intelligence, becoming a good listener, a good leader, a good colleague, a good parent, a good spouse, a good son/daughter, a good sibling and most importantly a good human being.

Lastly it seeks the super natural to grant you the wisdom to know the difference between what can be changed and what cannot. It is very important to understand and draw the line between what can be changed and what cannot.

The invaluable Serenity prayer can used when:

1. You feel overwhelmed, angry or triggered. Reciting the prayer in your mind will help you to pause, when agitated, and collect yourself;
2. It can help you to decide whether the situation is worth getting upset over, or if it is beyond your control;
3. Reciting the prayer first thing in the morning, is a great tool to start your day on the right foot;
4. The prayer can help a person develop a better relationship with their own higher power;
5. Reciting the prayer is a selfless way to ask for help.

The next time when there is a stimulus in your personal or professional life, use the space between the stimulus and your response to recollect the Serenity Prayer and I am sure that your response would be a mature one and would help improve your relationships.